i miss you

I miss you. a lot. i wish you were still in my life. I wish things were different then how they are presently, how you are absent from my life currently. Its sad of me to say but i'm hoping you contact me on my birthday. I miss hearing your voice. I miss talking to you, having you in my life. I just miss you and it makes me incredibly sad. I miss cuddling with you, your kisses, holding you hand...jsut everything. I miss that feeling that i knew i had someone in my life, at least one person who was special and i could turn to for evrything. i miss that. I miss you.....and im wondering if you miss me too. I still have that small hope in my that you'll be back, you'll realize this was all a mistake and that you'd rather have me in your life as i was, instead of how i am now, non-exisitant. though that may not be good for me to ahve this false hope..but none the less i still have it. ugh i should go to sleep before this tipsy feeling goes away...i can already feel it starting to dissipate....alright bed. before i cant go to sleep once again because thoughts keep flooding back to you and wishing you were still in my life. ugh i miss you..and talking to you..just having you in my life. why did this have to happen this way? why did tihngs ahve to end the way it did? i could have held on and waited for you to be ready, i wasn't pressuring you for a relationship...but you decided to end things anyway. i have so many unanswered quesitons left....why did it have to end this way?

Sad songs

I've started to write in a journal now...which explains somewhat of an absence on here. However as I was writing in my journal and listening to my itunes, this song came on and definitely hit home. I wasn't going to copy the entire song into my journal however my mind came straight to this blog of mind, why i started this in the first place. Why its called lyrics for words. This song can speak for how I feel at the moment.

I see your face in my mind as I drive away
'Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way
People are people and sometimes we change our minds
But it's killing me to see you go after all this time

Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm
Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm

Music starts playin' like the end of a sad movie
It's the kinda ending you don't really wanna see
'Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down
Now I don't know what to be without you around

And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand

And I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to

Never wanted this, never want to see you hurt
Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve
People are people and sometimes it doesn't work out
[ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/t/taylor-swift-lyrics/breathe-lyrics.html]
Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out

And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand

And I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to

It's two a.m., feelin' like I just lost a friend
Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me
It's two a.m., feelin' like I just lost a friend
Hope you know this ain't easy, easy for me

And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me, oh

I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry

-Breathe, Taylor Swift