Sunday, January 15, 2017

Well, here's this thought. (s)

Wow. It's been two years since my last post. We're gonna forget that for a second, and just let me write what i need to get out at the moment. (aka that was always the purpose of this blog)

Every time I read/hear a quote about finding that one person you can feel completely comfortable with sitting in silence, I think of one person. And usually one person only. Maybe because he was the first person that I ever experienced this with...in fact I distinctly remember writing a post in this blog years ago about that feeling...I'll go back and look for it, just for nostalgia sake after this. But also funny thing is, I haven't spoken to this person in months, probably years. Actually, year probably years since we've seen each other and actually had a conversation. *Side note, I really do want to get better at keeping up with communication with people. I find days go by before I can respond to people or just reach out to people, if I ever do. I wonder how many relationships I've let falter because of my lack of communication. Though of course, its a two way street, but whatever. There's a lot to work through in those last few sentences anyway. Also I always do this, have some wine, or alcohol and thoughts just start spilling out of me that I need to share. I've thought about these past few weeks that I needed to revisit my physical journal, look at my last entry and try to write something to wrap up my 2016 because, knowing me, i haven't written in my physical journal for some time too. And I feel like I need to be better at that too. To write my feelings down, or express them. Besides the fact of going to therapy. Which is the more expensive option. lol. ANYWAY, back to what I started this post about. Or thought I started this post about.

Feeling comfortable in silence. Hm. The person I felt this with. Probably 75% of this blog is about this person. Which, is interesting. To say the least. It's him and then my mother. And some other sprinklings of other people. I wonder what that means. If it means anything. Could it? Probably. Maybe. Anyway, this post also just help me not to act on the desire to text, said person, and say i kinda missed them. I missed the conversations I had with him and the comfort I felt. The communication we had was so easy, well easy. Things were complicated sometimes, as past posts can show, but still, when feeling nostalgic, you remember the good times. lol So. yea. there's that. Who knows maybe more thoughts will come in my mind, and this won't be my only post tonight.

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