empty. numb.

I made another mark yesterday. After two hours of sitting, thinking and picturing what would happen...what if...

I feel numb. I feel as though i don't have the right to feel better. I should feel like shit. I'm a horrible person. I've hurt people due to my own inability to do things, to take action. I deserve to not do anything, to sit in the dark, in my room the entire day. I should starve myself. I don't deserve to eat anything. I don't need it. I don't even deserve to be on this computer or enjoy anything. I shouldn't.